Chicken Ankles
by YuugisGirl
Summary: You kicked a seven year old!" Arrogantshipping KaibaxMai One-shot. Contest-fic


A/N: This is my Arrogantshipping (KaibaxMai) fic for Computerfreak101's YGO writing contest. It takes place a few years after the series. I liked the original concept but the execution…

Disclaimer: If I owned it I'd be rich. DO you see any money around here?

Chicken Ankles

The room stood silent and still; the very air was frozen as if held hostage by some strange, hypnotic spell. The space had a wealthy feel too it, each furnishing gleaming with the halo of its expense, but the atmosphere was cold, almost sterile, like a hospital. Two males occupied the lavish quarters, one, tall and noble, was seated comfortably in a handsome leather-backed chair, while the other, rather small an adolescent in appearance, stood statue-like before him. They held each other's gazes, icy cobalt wrapped intently around warm ebony. Neither moved. Neither blinked. Whatever force held their tongues and stayed their bodies, gripped the room with its trance. Everything was as a painting- not a soul stirred.

And suddenly the spell was broken.

"…You kicked a seven year old…?" the words wrenched themselves from Mokuba's disbelieving mouth, shattering the silence.

"Yes. Your point?" Seto Kaiba's blue orbs were cold, indifferent; his lithe body leaned back casually in his chair as he gazed at his little brother over the tips of his tented fingers.

"…A seven year old…" The younger male was frozen, dazed; his bulbous eyes and gaping mouth making him appear remarkably like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Repeating yourself does nothing you know." Kaiba replied emotionlessly, eyeing Mokuba's expression with a rather detached curiosity.

"Like an actual seven year old child?!" Mokuba's tongue struggled to keep pace with the quip at which he spoke, the muscle paralyzed by his incredulity.

Azure eyes rolled within their sockets as the older Kaiba's lips curled into a smirk. "And here I thought you were intelligent…"

"Seto, this is no time for your stupid sarcasm!" The ice that had held the younger captive was melting, starting at his fingers which curled into shaking fists, up to his trembling black tresses, until his whole body shuddered with passion.

"There is never a wrong place nor a wrong time for the use of sarcasm Mokuba." The brunet goaded, chuckling at the furious red tinge the statement placed upon his brother's face.

Mokuba's eyes burned with anger, his fingers tearing relentlessly at his hair and forcing his wild mane far past its usual state of unkemptness. "Don't you realize what you've done?! YOU KICKED A SEVEN YEAR OLD!"

"A snot nosed, arrogant, annoying punk of a seven year old." Kaiba intoned, loving the way his words grated against Mokuba's nerves.

"But a child none the less! Jesus Kaiba, ever heard of a little thing called SELFCONTROL?!" Kaiba flinched. His brother _never_ called him by his last name unless he was really, _really_ pissed. Part of the older boy knew that it was time to relent- unless he wanted to see Mokuba's brains splattered across the floor once his head exploded- but the more prideful part of his personality, the side that usually won over all his other emotions, knew that backing down was akin to loosing. And Seto Kaiba simply did not _do_ loosing.

"Yes, and I believe you could benefit from the concept." Kaiba smirked, eyeing his brother's mad, roving eyes- a twitch going off in the left one. He chuckled.

"Just be quiet!" By now, Mokuba had taken to pacing, his short legs driving him swiftly to and fro across the room. His disheveled appearance and frenzied expression promoted him from deer in the head lights to rabid squirrel. "I mean, what in god's name did he do to tick you off!"

Kaiba scowled at the memory of the irritating child, his brows knitting together as a crease in his forehead displayed his displeasure. "The little brat wouldn't stop poking my arm! God had nothing to do with it."

Mokuba's pacing stopped abruptly, his head revolving slowly to face his brother's as his mouth opened and closed rapidly. His lips puckered out slightly and he graduated from squirrel to fish. "Couldn't you have just…_asked him to stop_?!"

"I tried, Mokuba, it's not my fault that the idiot's parents never taught him manners!" The brunet simply "forgot" to add how he'd he threatened to kill the twerp if he didn't cease his actions. Mokuba didn't need to know _everything_.

"But…b-but…why…how…" Mokuba continued his aquatic impersonation, his eyes joining in as he blinked rapidly.

"He kept asking for my autograph. I told him no and thus the aggravating "poking" commenced. I _did_ tell him to stop. The brat just didn't want to listen. If words fail then actions are the next best option." Kaiba stated evenly, convincingly.

"You could have just _given_ him the autograph instead of _assaulting_ him!" Mokuba hissed, burying his face in his hands. "Oh god, what are we going to do about this."

"About what?" Kaiba asked, genuinely confused

Mokuba stared at his brother as if he had gone mad. "This entire situation! You are the CEO of a company that sells games to _children_! You can't just go around _pummeling_ ever child that gets on your nerves! What message do you think that sends to our buyers?!" the black haired boy hurled the information at his brother, his expression screaming to him that such news should be obvious.

It was, in retrospect, but Kaiba tried to hide his blunder. "Nobody is going to care that I taught the little brat a lesson. If they heard the whole story-" Kaiba was cut off by his brother's crazed laugh.

"You really think the tabloids are going to portray you as an upstanding citizen being terrorized by some street punk?! Please, you'll be the big bad rich man who attacked his poor, defenseless little fan when all the kid wanted was you to write your name on a sheet of paper. Trust me, this will get blown so far out of portion you'll end up having molested the kid by Saturday." Mokuba's pacing had increased in speed, his legs practically blurred beneath his form as he pinch the bridge of his nose with thumb and forefinger.

Kaiba, for once, was silent.

"Alright." The younger said slowly, never relenting in his sprint-like trek. "We have to do some damage control and _fast_. You need to call a press conference and apologize to the kid."

Kaiba rolled his eyes.

"You need to make some kind of big gesture, like donating to charity."

Kaiba shrugged. Money was definitely not an issue.

"And you need to go out and socialize with the right people. Attend fundraisers, charity balls and-"

Kaiba cut him off as the horror of what his brother was suggesting dawned upon him

"Mokuba, don't you dare."

"But you're going to have to-"

"Mokuba I'm warning you!"

"-go to-"

"MOKUBA KAIBA!"

"-parties-"

* * *

Mokuba stared into the closet, if this place could be called such. It was so large, two stories high and countless yards long, that several families could have lived in it quite comfortably. There were rows upon rows of racks lining the walls all the way up to the ceiling. A woman's paradise. But there was one flaw.

"Seto, there's nothing but white trench coats in here!"

Mokuba turned to see his brother seated upon his lavish bed in the next room; his eyes were flat and turned down so they appeared to be examining his upturned palms. He was whispering softly under his breath, though Mokuba could faintly here something along the lines of -"The end of the world."- slip from between his lips.

The younger rolled his eyes, lifting a black buckled boot from the countless array within the closet and hurling it at his sibling's head.

Kaiba cried out, falling backwards from the force of the blow.

"Hey!" Mokuba called over his shoulder. "Stop acting so emo and pay attention when I talk to you."

Kaiba didn't respond.

The black haired boy rolled his eyes once more, turning his attention back to the crisis before him. How could the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company not own a single article of clothing that wasn't made out of leather? Mokuba pondered his predicament. 'Seto needs something to wear to the charity ball tonight.'

Whipping out his cell phone, Mokuba called the only person he knew with enough fashion sense to save his brother's sinking ship.

* * *

The parlor doors flew open, their oak fronts slamming against the wall with such force that several nearby servants toppled over from the shock. A lone figure stood in the threshold, the light of the outdoor world framing her feminine curves in a white nimbus. Her golden locks tossed about as if caught in a gale, the unseen winds rippling the fabric of her rather revealing purple attire. The woman's violet eyes shone with fire as she parted her crimson lips and declared "I'm here, where's the emergency!"

Mokuba pushed himself up from the ground upon which he'd collapsed moments before, taken aback by the newcomer's sudden arrival.

The moment the woman's brilliant eyes landed upon him, she let out an excited squeak and sprinted towards the staggering boy, casting the large duffle bag she was hefting into the chest of a surprised butler who was knocked several feet backwards and left gasping for air.

"Mokuba!" she exclaimed, delighted, flinging her arms around him. The black haired male hugged her tentatively, a look of utter confusion clouding his features. He gazed up at her with puzzled expression when she finally released him from her strangle hold. "How did you get in…We have a security system…?"

"Oh please," Mai Kujaku scoffed, winking one luscious black lash at him "Don't insult my intelligence."

"But what about the guard dogs?" Mokuba pressed on, utterly bewildered.

Mai's lips curled into a knowing grin, her hand raised to display three studded collars which she twirled absentmindedly around her forefinger. "Oh nothing…"

Mokuba gulped. "Umm…he's…uh…right this way." The boy added awkwardly, his voice trembling slightly.

Mai smiled gleefully, displaying her array of perfectly polished pearly whites. "Excellent!" she linked arms with the black eyed boy. Snapping her manicured cuticles in a command for the butler lugging her bag to follow them, Mai marched off down the hall, her stilettos clicking noisily against the tiled ground as Mokuba clung desperately to her arm like some pooch she was parading in a dog show.

"How's Shizuka?" Mai asked as Mokuba directed her down yet another hallway; the labored breathing of the butler and their rhythmic footfalls the only other sounds in the still mansion.

Mokuba smiled to himself, eyeing the glittering ring upon his hand with reverence. "She's doing really well. Seto and Jounouchi didn't take so kindly to the situation at first, but at least their acting civil now." He didn't delve into just _how_ long it had taken both males to become mature enough to be in the same room as each other without managing to break at least seven different objects. "Thanks again for doing this. Seto will appreciate it; don't listen to a thing he tells you otherwise."

Mai laughed, ruffling his wild mane affectionately. "Anything for my best friends Bo, and don't worry, I learned a long time ago not to listen to a thing that comes out of that jerk's mouth."

Mokuba chuckled along with her, feeling the air around them lighten considerably. "Here we are." He added, after finally having traversed several different hallways and numerous staircases, pointing at a large cherry wood door.

His next sentence was abruptly cut off by a loud crash from behind him. They both turned in time to see the aged butler crumple to the floor, sweat pouring down his body, his breathing rapid and shallow. "I…" he gasped from his kneeing position upon the ground, furious brown eyes turned up to meet Mokuba's gaze "…quit." With that he promptly fell flat on his face, growing still.

"Oh my god is he dead?!" Mokuba cried, rushing to his side, his fingers pressing frantically against the wrinkled skin of his neck as he searched for a pulse.

"He's fine, see, he's still breathing." Mai strode over to where the old man lay, kicking him over so that he steadily rising chest could be seen. "Don't worry so much."

"We can't just leave him here!" the younger of the two cried.

"Sure we can." Mai, gently pulled Mokuba to his feet. "I'm sure _somebody_ will find him." She leaned over and casually gripped the duffle bag beside the fallen ex-servant with two thin fingers, throwing it over her shoulder.

"What's in that thing anyway?" Mokuba asked, his eyes lingering on the bag in Mai's hand.

"Just my beauty supplies." The girl laughed at Mokuba's bewildered expression, before dragging the dark haired boy into Kaiba's bedroom.

* * *

"There is no way I'm letting that hooker touch me." Kaiba stood at the very corner of his vast bedroom, his arms folded protectively over his chest as his blue eyes glared hatefully over at his younger brother.

"Seto!" Mokuba cried reproachfully, throwing Mai an apologetic look, though the blonde woman seemed unaffected. She continued to bustle around Kaiba's bathroom vanity, setting aside several different bottles, brushes and other necessary items for "beautification".

"Please big brother." The younger Kaiba's bottom lip puckered out, trembling slightly.

Kaiba felt his will begin to falter. Damn Mokuba. Damn him and all his adorable pouting powers!

"Fine." He huffed, when he could no longer take the pathetic expression. "But I'm only doing this for you." Before he had even finished his sentence, Kaiba found a pair of arms wrapped around his midriff

"Thanks Seto." Mokuba smiled against the fabric of his brother's shirt. Kaiba grinned softly, the brunet's palm smoothing out Mokuba's unruly black locks.

"Sorry to interrupt this touching moment, but the doctor is in the house and I believe I have a job to do." Both boys cried out in shock, turning to see Mai hovering inches away from them, a can of hairspray clutching tightly in one hand, and a small black comb held in the other. "Come my patient!"

How she managed to bring the CEO from his secluded corner all the way to the bathroom, Mokuba would never know. The next thing he was aware of was Mai's hand upon his brother's shoulder as she shoved Kaiba roughly into a revolving chair next to the vanity. Where the chair had come from would also forever remain a mystery.

"Don't manhandle me woman!" Kaiba protested angrily, blue eyes livid and pale cheeks a blaze as Mai spun him around to face his furious reflection.

"Now!" she cried, ignoring her subject's protests and jeers. "Let the transformation begin!"

Mokuba would cherish the horrified expression upon his brother's face until his dying day.

Mai's hands whirled about Kaiba's brunet locks in a fevered frenzy, her comb cutting through the tresses like a knife through butter. Slowly the lifeless mullet was pulled back, refined, and restrained by Mai's every constant application of hairspray.

"Let up wench, the fumes are suffocating me!" the blue eyed man chocked, batting away the frothy clouds that shrouded his head.

And she didn't stop at the hair upon his head.

What is it with your eyebrows Kaiba?! Are you raising caterpillars up here?!" Mai cried, indicating towards the overgrown bushes above the CEO's eyes. "These, my good sir, are tweezers." she twirled a metallic object between her dainty fingers, smirking at Kaiba's befuddled expression. "And they are your new best friend."

The CEO shot her a look that clearly questioned her sanity, but the blonde ignored him, tilting his chin back so that his eyes were now turned towards the ceiling.

He didn't resist, but the muscles along his neck tensed with irritation and discomfort. "What are you doing?" he snapped at her. Mai didn't reply, simply placing a cool hand on his brow, the other wielding the tweezers.

"Brace yourself." She said calmly, though a delighted smirk played with the corners of her mouth. "This is going to hurt."

"Oh please, do you really think that some silly female ritual could actually hurt- HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!" Kaiba howled as Mai's silver instrument pulled away from his face, one small brown hair clutched between its pincers. "Jesus woman!" he cried, rubbing the throbbing patch of skin upon his brow. "What kind of sick torture is this?!"

"Just a silly female ritual." Mai chuckled, her eyes alight with a fiendish short of glee. "And don't worry my dear Kaiba, we only have," she scrutinized his forehead for a moment "Three hundred and seventy two more to go."

Mokuba's sides were sore the next morning from laughing.

After conquering the forest upon his Kaiba's forehead, Mai proceeded to the CEO's wardrobe. "What kind of pathetic excuse for clothes are these?" She guffawed, fiddling with the hem of Kaiba's white trench coat. "Seriously, at what lame Elvis impersonation shop did you buy this little get up?"

Kaiba growled, his anger flaring at the attack upon his pride. "This coming from the woman who parades around looking like some cheap hooker." He drawled, earning him a good slap in the face from a livid looking Mai.

He would have retaliated with equal, if not greater, force if Mokuba hadn't been gazing so imploringly at him. Damn that boy.

Mai unearthed a bundle of clothing from the seemingly bottomless pit of supplies known as her duffle bag. She practically forced the struggling Kaiba into the garments, shoving his arms through the jacket sleeves and fastening his tie so tightly around his neck, the CEO almost passed out from lack of oxygen.

Mokuba had taken to sitting in the bedroom, the comical sounds of his companion's pointless bickering drifting to his ears from the open doorway.

Finally Mai strode into the room. Mokuba stood the moment she entered, taking in her wide smile and elated air.

"The surgery was a success!" the violet eyed woman exclaimed. "Presenting the new and improved Seto Kaiba!" she bowed towards the doorway and stepped aside, allowing Kaiba's lanky form to stride out of the bathroom.

Mokuba gasped.

His brother's long, strangely styled hair had been slicked back elegantly. He wore a white suit of fine material with a sapphire vest and matching neck tie. His shoes were the same, polished color as his suit and the rich aroma of cologne rolled off of him in pungent waves.

Mai smiled, a brilliant gleam in her eye as she circled Kaiba's form. "I've done it." She whispered to herself. "I've conquered the beast! Armed with nothing but my trusty brush and faithful can of hairspray, I ,Mai the almighty, have defeated the dreaded dragon!" She grinned smugly.

"I look like an idiot." Kaiba growled, his fists clenched and his teeth gritted.

"With that look on your face, I'd say you do too." Mai intoned and Kaiba scowled at her.

"Is this all I need to do for this…" Kaiba shuddered openly "…party... tonight? I don't have to do anything extra like bring a date, correct?"

Mokuba's heart sank. He'd completely forgotten. Turning his dark eyes upon Mai, Mokuba used his most advanced, most effective method of manipulation. Puckering out his trembling bottom lip, Mokuba gazed imploringly at the blonde, moisture glistening around the edges of his vision.

Mai looked at him for several moments, violet locked with black in fierce and silent combat, before her willpower gave out. "I'll go change." She grumbled, stalking out of the room. Damn Mokuba.

She returned relatively quickly, though with a much different countenance then when she had left. Mai's long flowing mane had been pulled back into an elegant knot at the back of her head. Her dress was floor length, hanging off her shoulders and of a blue hue complementary to Kaiba's vest and tie. Upon her neck and ears winked the light of diamonds and her silver slippers sparkled with a dim glow.

"You look beautiful." Mokuba said in awe.

Mai blushed, spinning around so as to afford him a full view. "Thanks, it's just something I had lying around inside my bag.

Mokuba didn't ask why she would have such a thing with her. Questions like that were silly and, when directed at people like Mai, never likely to get a true answer.

Noticing his brother's silence, Mokuba elbowed him hard in the ribs. "Ow!" the CEO hissed under his breath, stepping on his sibling's foot. "You look nice." Kaiba forced through clenched teeth, though Mokuba could not help but notice the rosy hue that decorated his cheeks.

"Shall we go then?" Mai asked.

Kaiba groaned and Mokuba nodded.

"Gosh I'm going to look so fat next to chicken ankles over here." Mai stated. "Seriously Kaiba, so you _ever_ eat?!"

"What are you talking about, you always look fat!"

"Why I outa…"

Mokuba smiled to himself as the two walked out the their waiting limo, realizing that his brother might, for once, actually _enjoy_ an evening out.

* * *

A/N: Ugh. Just ugh. Review?


End file.
